How Can I Avoid Hurting My Friend's Feelings

Dear Coach Laura,

I have a friend who is new to the area. She invites herself to functions that I am involved in as a way to help develop a life here. There are times I would really like to spend quality time with other people. How can I gently tell her that without hurting her feelings? She is an amazing person and I don’t want to hurt her.

Dear Conflicted Friend,

I understand you want to avoid hurting your friend’s feelings. But this isn’t really about her. It’s about you making sure you get quality time with people you know. I would recommend the next time she comes along with you that at the function you make sure to do what you want to do. If it’s an open event, then it shouldn’t matter if she is there or not.

You could even let her know ahead of time you are going to be spending time mingling and connecting with people you haven’t had a chance to connect with in a long time and won’t be able to introduce her around or spend much time with her. Let her know that you would be happy to make time to go to lunch/dinner/etc. with her next week/month so you two can have some quality time as well.

Honoring yourself is the best example you can be for your girlfriends.

Here’s to your joy.

Coach Laura

One Reply to “How Can I Avoid Hurting My Friend's Feelings”

  1. coachdona

    Thank you! I think the advice about calling ahead and maybe setting some dedicated time with her at a later date is a fantastic idea. This is definately creating a win-win.

Comments are closed.